I left the warm and sunny state of Florida on a cold and cloudy
day. I was off to see the world on a merchant ship. I also wanted
to avoid prosecution for selling counterfeit Girl Scout cookies.
It wasn't me, really the guy they want was the one armed man, but
I digress. I landed on the shores of New Zealand broke, hungry and
worried my allergy to wool would act up with all these sheep. I
found work as an assistant in a genetic research lab working with
cows and sheep. I got lucky the allergy only happens after the furry
stuff leaves the sheep I found out. One day in the lab Miss Prue,
my boss, was mixing a new formula for increasing milk production
while I was carrying the new enhanced female hormones Miss Prue
had asked for when I slipped in something left behind by one of
the smaller cows or larger sheep and was bathed in the formula.
As a result I went from being an average guy with brown haired to
being a vivacious redhead who is her own dairy farm. Miss Prue's
formula has me giving milk every half hour. Finding that most people
smell better than cows or sheep we left New Zealand for America
and Miss Prue opened HuggleBugs LTD. Finding that telephones are
less dangerous than my friends in the research labs I choose to
become the receptionist and ruler of the break room.